Judgmental ways of English teachers

Well, what to write about as we enter the slowest part of the calendar? Maybe time to just write about writing? My old critics would say it's a subject about which I know nothing. How much of a service do "English teachers" provide, really? It's easy to get discouraged in their classes, isn't it? Well, I would not get a unanimous "aye" to that. 

But I do know that the formal instruction of reading and writing can be a downer. It's easy to suggest that English teachers perform in their own little fiefdom as it were. It becomes a world where they learn how to reinforce each other. This is to secure a feeling of job security. It's human nature to want job security. 

How might I support this line of thinking? As a follower of the news I can share on this: A graduate dissertation by Jill Biden came to light. A conservative media personality arranged for an "English teacher" to evaluate it. You know where this is going: all kinds of errors. This led the media personality to conclude in the harshest way that the First Lady was "borderline illiterate." His exact words. This was a Fox News personality who had the 7 p.m. time slot at the time. 

"Borderline illiterate." Oh, I think he said "may be borderline illiterate." Whatever, the crude putdown was obvious. 

Whatever college was in charge of Jill's endeavor, don't you think the college came away quite pleased with her work? Well of course it was impressive, even though it's not going to change the world. And the writing. Since that is the crux topic here, I'll say I sampled a portion and of course it was good. It was easily sufficient to get across her research conclusions. 

Perfect? Oh hell how many of us could write something to the complete satisfaction of "picky English teachers?" Such people operate in a world of rules which subconsciously I guess give them a feeling of power. Power equals job security. Or let's put it this way: the ability to put forward all their rules and be accepted in academic ranks gives their discipline of English continued legitimacy. 

Actually nothing new about this. However, today I think English teachers feel threatened. They may sense that the real world is catching up to their racket. I can point out an excellent example from mass communications. That's a related field, right? Full of teachers who like English teachers press a whole mountain of norms and rules on their students. 

Here's a good example: headline-writing for students considering newspaper work. When you get right down to it, all that matters with headlines is that they communicate effectively. Do mass communications teachers still push a "count" system for headlines? You jot down a proposed heading and then see if it's acceptable for filling the designated space. The idea is to fill that space as much as possible. 

So a capital "T" would get a particular count, an "I" and a 'W," as if any of this fulfills any reasonable purpose. It fills no purpose whatsoever. 

The media professionals of today would disregard all that. We can see that because it's common to see a two-deck headline from an Internet page where the second line is just one word! The heading was likely written with the idea that the words would all stay in one line. However, the last word "dropped down" and is the only word in the line. Certainly this has no impact on how you appreciate the headline - the info it conveys. 

So it was always just a cosmetic thing? I'm not sure it was even that. I will repeat that such rigid guidelines for mass communications people, English teachers and others had to do with the teachers' need to feel power. That's lest their job security shows signs of crumbling. You know how powerful that fear can be. 

But really I'd suggest that so-called "academia" has been in retreat for some time. What survives and thrives are the fields that have real demonstrable power, self-evident importance. 

I remember seeing our campus newspaper here in Morris when the students involved with the newspaper were obviously following the headline "count" system. The quite obvious problem was that the headlines came to have stilted or odd wording. I saw a heading on the front page that made me wince. 

The newspaper staff was aware of the "rules" even though the campus probably did not have a class that actually taught it. A strong sense floated around of having headlines that tightly fit the designated spaces. (Of course we're talking printed media.) 

Then along comes the Internet and blows up everything! As it has in countless fields, as the old pretensions coming from schools are disregarded. 

I got curious about seeing the online headings with one word in the second deck. A bigger "violation" of the old headline rules you could never find. Sometimes the hosts of cable news and commentary programs would show a page from the web as they spoke. And there's the single word as the second deck. Outrageous, right? No, in fact I never heard anyone even act like they gave a rip about the second deck. The program hosts just stayed on their subject matter. Because, all that mattered with the headline was that it communicated in a pertinent way. That's all. And to think generations of mass communications students got their brains tied up in knots trying to follow all the rules. 

A friend of mine with "Minnpost" told me that one word would sometimes "slip" to the second deck as the result of a particular Internet browser being used. 

 

Just be real 

Recently we had the exhibit of the English teacher whose services were arranged by Tucker Carlson of Fox News. The English teacher was at the ready for tearing Jill Biden's thesis apart. The teacher should have had too much pride to do that. Better yet, just be real and realize how people communicate in the real world. 

You'll notice in my own writing that not all my sentences are technically complete sentences. Partly that's because I am most aware of how people today appreciate thoughts that are expressed compactly. This is often with short bursts of thought that make the point even without all the standard components of an English sentence. 

The English teacher would get into all the nomenclature of writing - is that the right word? - like nouns, verbs, prepositions. I remember being told once "don't start a sentence with a preposition." And I'd like to respond "don't be such a pain in the butt." 

 

A need to give grades 

But teachers have always had a foundation for giving grades based on rules that become an end in themselves. We might put an asterisk by Tucker Carlson's little "project" on Fox News: he would want to humiliate a Democrat. We should not be so juvenile as to accept his shenanigans. Very obviously Jill Biden is a refined and intelligent person - case closed. 

Edwin Newman

You want another example? I remember when Edwin Newman wrote his book in the '70s about how the English language was deteriorating and being handled recklessly by many including many in power. 

To make a point, an English teacher from somewhere came forward and did the same thing as was done to Jill Biden. Went through Newman's book as if with a scythe, a scythe that English teachers always have prepared. Fail to capitalize "midwest?" OK the scythe will take a bite, look out. And on and on. Look for the little red pen markings everywhere. 

Teachers develop bodies of rules so they have a basis for their draconian "grading" systems. I think this has faded. If you're too hard on students with your judgment these days, heck the students have options, like just leaving the academic setting. 

This temptation or pull has never been greater. Are teachers adjusting? I'd say it must be a work in progress.

- Brian Williams - morris mn minnesota - bwilly73@yahoo.com