With a little inspiration from Red Green. . .

"Now if you'll excuse me. . ."
That's the line that set ups the final gag in many episodes of the crazy Canadian show "Red Green."
The line sets up the demo for whatever how-to idea Green was lamely but humorously presenting. And then all heck breaks loose of course.
I'll borrow the line to set up my next 3-4 posts here on "I Love Morris," posts which will get into media issues. I have a background in this but I don't want visitors here to think the site has become an excuse to vent, spout, pontificate or whatever on the media and how the "dead tree" aspect of it, by all pertinent evidence, is fading. ("Dead trees" equate with newspapers of course.)
That's a downbeat angle so before continuing, let's enjoy Red Green's first winter poem, circa 1989, apt considering that the calendar is indeed at midpoint of the snowy time of year.
It is winter
The bear sleeps
Not alone like me
But with many other bears
In some dark den
I bet that doesn't smell too great

Bits of evidence surface constantly as to the new direction that tech is taking us i.e. away from traditional media. Newspaper vending boxes are increasingly rare.
I recently had a couple of unusual adventures seeking the Star Tribune Saturday edition, which is the only one I typically deem necessary to buy during the week. I have access to publicly available copies otherwise.
Weekends are no longer business as usual for the state's most prominent and historically credible newspaper. No longer does the Strib market a "Saturday" paper per se at the newsstands. It's called "Early Sunday," but the paper seems conflicted on just how to package and market this animal.
On a recent Saturday in Morris, the west side Casey's store, a bastion of life in an otherwise quiet, sleeping community in the early hours, had the new Strib but without the circulars that were supposed to be included. The Sunday circulars are supposed to be in with the "Early Sunday" paper available Saturday. It's promised at the top of page 1.
The helpful clerk insisted I accept a refund and he took the stack of remaining papers off the stand.
Then on Saturday, Jan. 31, the quest was more troublesome because the Saturday paper, or whatever you want to call it, simply eluded me. This might seem like a mundane annoyance to many of you, but as a media maven I'm troubled. Here's how I told the story in an e-mail to media writer David Brauer of Minnpost:

Hello Mr. Brauer - Another perplexing Saturday here in western Minnesota figuring out how the Star Tribune is handling its new weekend arrangements, sans a "Saturday" paper per se.
At 8:15 a.m. I stopped at the local grocery store - we only have one now since Coborn's closed - and saw the green vending box was empty. No big deal, so I went inside the store where they have a courtesy counter with newspapers. I pawed through some Star Tribs and couldn't find any with today's date. So I asked a checkout gal and she said she thought the papers hadn't arrived. Strange.
So I headed over to DeToy's Restaurant where I found another empty green vending box. There's a chair at the counter inside where they stack any house papers that have accumulated - sometimes customers just leave theirs - and it was "no dice" trying to locate a Saturday (Early Sunday) Minneapolis paper. I saw another customer come in and paw through papers on the chair, obviously looking for the current one.
It was in vain that I had my reading glasses with me. I take a little extra time for breakfast Saturday and the waitress automatically brings a pot of coffee. Without a paper I just sat there getting intoxicated on caffeine.
I left the place at 8:50 and noticed that still-empty green vending box. I then returned to the grocery store and learned "still no paper." This is highly irregular. The store and restaurant are the hotspots for people traffic in town, so if they didn't have the papers you could be sure they were nowhere. I came back into town at 2:50 to visit the library, where I am now, and before coming here I stopped at the grocery store out of curiosity and still saw no papers, but I also asked. And I was told that the papers had come but they were gone! In other words, way, way too few papers were dropped off.
I wonder if the Strib is discouraging us outstaters from buying that Early Sunday edition, and trying to induce us instead to buy the "real" Sunday paper. I have always taken for granted being able to obtain a Minneapolis paper reasonably early in the morning, any day of the year, and now that this assumption is no longer in place we've taken another baby step to getting out of the habit of relying on newspapers, I feel. - Brian W.
(end of quoted e-mail)

On the day I'm typing this post, Saturday, Feb. 6, all is right with the world for getting my expected Saturday (or Early Sunday) Strib, but now there's a new shock: The new University Register of the UMM campus, so new there was a bundle still wrapped up at the entryway to City Center Mall, didn't even include coverage of the Joseph Basel alleged Louisiana espionage caper.
Joe Basel is a recent University of Minnesota-Morris graduate who left a big imprint here with his political activism. Now it appears that it's activism Donald Segretti-style. Remember, fellow baby boomers? Wasn't that a pleasant chapter?
The Basel caper (with three accomplices apparently led by James O'Keefe) was covered above the fold on page 1 of the New York Times. The Register apparently weighed the matter differently. With influence from UMM's administration? Who knows. As a boomer I'm always suspicious, always on the lookout for that proverbial 18-minute "gap in the tape."
Actually the temperate, safe stance of the Register is a breath of fresh air compared to what the Counterweight (the Fox News equivalent) brought to the campus. Basel was tied in with that. Hopefully the legal system will now declaw him.
There was another Saturday surprise! This was when I saw what appeared to be a veritable pile of ad circulars for Alexandria businesses stuffed in with the Morris paper that came out that day. I felt like uttering an expletive. Aside from the fact that no one here is going to be influenced by these circulars, it's a mountain of waste.
If my upcoming posts on the media seem tiresome, take a hiatus and trek elsewhere on the web - maybe visit James Lileks.
"Now if you'll excuse me. . ."
-Brian Williams - Morris Minnesota - bwilly73@yahoo.com